Day Five

Day Five

Monday was a really good coffee day! I was so excited to show the world I was a coffee drinker. I could just imagine the way it would change my life. It be like an old black and white television show where the husband leaves for work happy, the kids leave for school happy, even the dog is happy (except I'd be working rather than not working). People would be smiling everywhere. Lots of whistling would be had by all. I'd need to grab a newspaper and roll it up and carry it under my arm. Yeah, that be sweet! Well, almost perfect but not today. I decided not to wear my peacoat to work that day. I guess I needed to show that I wasn't a trendy coffee drinker after all. I was now someone who loathed the trendy coffee drinker and was completely repulsed by the way they act like they're so cool with their trendy coat and cup of coffee. Bleck! I'm an old school coffee drinker. It's a way of life. (this being the third day I've drank coffee) So I guess to best represent my idea of coffee, I'll will wear the peacoat on fridays, saturdays, and sundays, and I will loathe the peacoat monday through thursday. There, that's settled.

I left for work a little early so I could stop by Circle K because the other day I saw this huge sign that said 99 cent coffee on Mondays. So I got the kids dropped off and headed over to pick up my first purchased coffee of the season (or ever). As I parked my 'Sploder, as we call our vehicle, two important things ran through my mind. Number one: what flavor am I gonna get? and Two: Do I go ahead and buy gum because I now realize I'm gonna have to use my debit card for 99 cents. Nice. Nothing is more embarrassing than swiping my card for $1.29. Maybe I could use that as an excuse to get a Little Debbie Apple Pie... I'm mean, for the sake of the debit card. Taking one for the team. Well, the flavor was an easy one to decide because as I walked in the door there was a huge Pumpkin Spice Cappuccino advertisement. I figured I'd better get that one because it wouldn't be available for long and what if it just happened to be my favorite flavor ever? As I write this I crack up at my obvious weakness to advertising. Ha! When it came time to pay I went ahead with a pack of gum that helps with calcium in your teeth. I should probably worry about things like that since I am now a coffee drinker. I have a gut feeling there is no clinical basis to this statement and as a nurse I should probably be able to explain why but I didn't care... Impulse buy... I've got bigger things to worry about like ear washes, and suspicious moles. I also threw in a bag of mini muffins. I wanted to grab some hostess cupcakes but I had to draw the line somewhere, I mean come on, isn't there some code of responsibility while I am wearing scrubs?

So I jump back in the 'Sploder and I imagine how I'm going to break the news to my patients... you know... that I drink coffee now. I wonder how they will react. I think some will relate to needing "my coffee" and our relationship will grow. Others will be repulsed that I don't follow the ADA 1800 calorie, no salt, no fat, no carb, no happiness, all forms of cardboard allowed diet. Some I won't even have to tell. They'll just "know" when I lean over to wrap the blood pressure cuff on their arm as my breath floats past them tickling their nostril hairs. I envisioned different ways I could carry my 99 cent coffee cup around the office. Coffee in one hand, laptop, in the other. Pro-fesh-ah-nal! Then I though of ways I'd need the patients to hold my coffee for me (the non-sick ones). They'd be all like "hey, let me hold that for you.. mmmm... smells so good... you're the best nurse EVER!". Or something like that. I talked Angie my co-nurse and Heather the physicians assistant into practicing rooming a patient with my coffee... It was exactly how I envisioned it...

This one is of Heather. She could be a patient with a heart problem.


Now Angie, I don't know what her symptoms were but it didn't look good!


So after I got that out of the way the day ran pretty smooth. I broke the news to the Dr. that I now am a coffee drinker. He didn't offer to write me any prescriptions so I guess it's all good. He can't judge me anyway, I mean, he does pay me to find his missing coffee cup often left behind in the patient rooms. I do see him and Angie as my sources to all things Starbucks in the future since they both make the trek from Effingham daily. Of course, I have yet to actually get coffee from Starbucks, so pick up will be on hold for now. We girls decided to go out to lunch (i say we were celebrating my special day, they say it was just lunch). I didn't even get a Coke. Angie was my accountability partner and was performing her job well! After we O so shamefully gorged ourselves, I talked the girls into getting a pic with the 99 cent sign for my memory book. They agreed.



So we headed back to the Slamma and picked back up where we left off for a busy afternoon. It went fairly smooth. Just the usual stuff like refilling medications, rooming patients, making referrals, squeezing pus out of sores, etc. Around 3pm I was starting to get thirsty. Probably from all that salt at lunch! I began to openly discuss how bad I wanted a soda. Angie with my best interest in mind informed me that I did not need a pop. This was serious... I NEEEEDDD a pop. I began to feel like a six year old in toys r us that just realized we were only here to look. What!!! No Soda!! You mean your really gonna hold me to this... I had to devise a plan. How am I gonna get a soda. If I get it in a cup she will see that I'm drinking pop. And it's not like coffee isn't available. The boss man has some fancy coffee thing we can use any time we want. Like a damsel in distress the other Heather up front hears my cries for soda and came to my rescue. While Angie rooms a patient we devise a plan! Her suggestion: use the coffee travel mug and put Coke in it. GENIUS!! And Scheme We Did...

pardon my off-set look. we were in a serious hurry not to get caught...
So the day ended well. I got "my coffee" and "my soda" (and probably "my 10 lbs") Ha Ha. And as I pitifully and unsuccessfully try to drop the pop, coffee is slowly finding a place in my heart.